Stockholm Syndrome

Bubba, you must get out of this mind-set. You are falling into the effect of Stockholm Syndrome, whereby a gimp becomes attracted to his homosexual captor. Well, it's not Stockholm, more like Uppsala. But let's face it, it could be any city because all Europeans are gay. You can tell because they wear white shoes, or socks with sandals, or just generally look like lady-boys. There is more butt-sex per capita in Europe than any other country. I consider Europe to be a country. You might as well. They all smell the same - like garlic. And what is going on with those tiny cars? Only girls and pooftas drive cars like that. In Surrey Hills, men drive Mercedes and Jaguars. I, myself have an S-Class, silver.

Now what you need to do, Bubba, next time you have an intimate session by the fire, is bite down hard, get a skin sample and try and get it to Sgt. Johnson. The forsensic lab needs more evidence to detect your captor. He has told me they can only go so far on profiling. Lets face it. We know the guy is a demented faggot. We just have to catch him.